Wow my first blog... Not really that exciting. LOL I do these all the time on myspace. Hmm what to say. I don't know. Today has been kinda sad. I woke up sad. First I went to bed sad. I was watching a special on the Virginia Tech massacre and it hit home. I mean I will be a freshman in the fall. I have alot of friends who are freshmans at various colleges. It shouldn't have happened. They were there to learn, not to be gunned down. Its all a shock. It could have just as easily been at the local college here. Then I only got to talk to Slade for 6 minutes. He's working 7 12's and so we don't get to talk or see each other. The stress level at home is building. My parents can't stand Slade. They are trying to break us up. Why do parents do that? I was raised right, I am not going to make bad decisions and I will not let a guy ruin my future. He wants to get me out of my house. I understand why but I don't want to move in with him. Sure it would be convenient but I don't feel confortable about it. He says he's going to marry me. I have mixed emotions... I mean yea thats great, he can provide for me, will put up with my horses and says he loves me. BUT we've only known each other 4 months. I don't want to say I DO to the wrong man. Wow this may become a myspace blog too! I have some awesome bred horses at my place. I have 2 main prospects that I have REALLY high hopes for. One is a 3 yr old stallion who is a grandson of Strawfly Special and The Signature. The other is a yearling filly who is a granddaughter of Streakin Six and out of a g-daughter of Reckless Dash and Firewater Flit. If I leave then I lose them. I would fight my dad for the filly since I won the stud fee and have paid for everything to get her on the ground. I also pay for all their shots and feed and vet bills. 17 horses is alot for a 19 yr old to pay for! Don't get me wrong I love them but its hard. I want a life. I want to be able to compete and do good but right now I can't. I worked my butt off to get my all around gelding back into shape. He'd been in a pasture for 3 yrs and I FINALLY have him looking good. 4 shows have passed and my dad hasn't let me go to any. Makes me feel REAL GOOD! So lifes kinda crazy but I am a fighter and I know I will make it. I also know some major decisions are coming up fast. Am I ready? No. I pray I make the right ones! Ciao!